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OPINION: Come to Jesus, USF Football

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Close the door. Have a seat. Don’t talk.

NCAA Football: Wisconsin at South Florida Douglas DeFelice-USA TODAY Sports

Well USF football, you did it again. You went out there on the field last night in front of a national TV audience and a nice big crowd in the stands, and you pooped your pants. Then you sat down on the field in your own mess and cried. Then you got up and wiped your nose on your sleeve and tried to pull yourself together, until you fell down and peed yourself and pooped again and cried some more.

We’re not even going to get into whether or not Charlie Strong should still be coaching the team, because he clearly shouldn’t. This is a deeper issue than that. How many years in a row are you going to keep doing this? How many times are you going to get everyone’s hopes up? Go out there in front of the press and talk a big game and say Things Will Be Different or We’ve Figured It Out, and then let everyone down (at best) or completely embarrass yourselves (last night)? We’re up to what, like a decade? Even now, when you’re telling us that wasn’t you last night, and don’t give up on us, and all your goals are still in front of you... why should we believe you after all these other times? You don’t deserve the benefit of the doubt anymore.

Did you stop to think about the clips you all used in that hype video last week? Did you notice how many of those games happened 8 or 10 or 12 years ago? Did you notice how many of those games were in September and didn’t mean anything at the end of the season? Do you know what wasn’t in that clip? A single goddamn trophy, that’s what.

We’re sick and tired of waiting for you to win something. You’ve blown it every single time, no matter who the players are, no matter who the coaches are, no matter who is behind the scenes. And based on what we just watched, it’s going to be a long time before you have another chance to tease us again and then come up short.

How long do you think people are going to keep coming back for more? How many times will they keep buying season tickets, and following you out on the road, and moving heaven and earth to get students to show up, and spending hours out in the heat and humidity, and waiting out thunderstorms, just to see you pull this crap? Do you really expect people to give you money for an indoor practice facility right now? Or for anything? Is there a worse investment in Tampa right now than USF football?

I don’t live there, and I can only go off what I see and hear, but last night sure looked like the end of everyone’s patience with you. They all showed up last night and you didn’t. Now everyone is angrier than they’ve ever been... even worse than the McNeese game. (At least McNeese was the first game of a rebuild. Last night you were supposed to be a competitive team.) Your program is a complete joke from top to bottom, inside and out, on the field and off. Either you figure out how to fix it — ALL of it — or you’re going to watch the donations and the ticket sales and the fan support dry up and never come back.