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(DISCLAIMER: This game is for entertainment purposes only. No actual money is being wagered.)
Ladies and gentlemen! I did not come here today just to report the results of a fictional sports betting contest! I came here to sell you something and I want you! To pay particular attention! The amazing Master Tool Corporation, a subsidiary of Fly-By-Night Industries, has entrusted who? Me! To show you! The handiest and the dandiest kitchen tool you’ve ever seen! And don’t you wanna know how it works?
The comedian Gallagher passed away last Friday. He graduated from USF in 1970 with a degree in chemical engineering and a minor in English literature. He never mentioned his USF ties, though he did have one joke that did so obliquely: “I was in college for seven years. It was a real long war.”
So let’s all smash a watermelon in memory of a beloved fellow alumni. His act didn’t age well, but he’s still a comedy legend. He was probably the most famous USF alum from a field other than sports. Unless you’re a huge fan of Aasif Mandvi, or Drew from Office Space.
The defining moment of his acting career, and he wore green and gold. Gotta love that.
On to this week’s business. The cancellation of the Coastal Carolina-Virginia game resulted in one bet being voided, and one bet in a parlay being treated as a push (more on that in a minute). Most importantly, it wrecked a futures bet: ULhothot was in line to win 95.46 (45.46 plus his 50-unit bet back) on Virginia winning less than 7.5 games. By rule, that bet is now a push, so he will only get his 50 back. Rule 14.8.5.1 even says “If any game is unplayed, incomplete, or if an opponent or location changes, the bet is voided and the player neither wins or loses. This includes bets that have already clinched, such already a team already having met its win total.”
That game was also part of bullsonparade’s 400-unit parlay that also had USF-Tulsa over 58.5, and USF +13. So he’ll win 1,000 units if USF loses a high-scoring weeknight road game no worse than 36-24. Good luck with that.
Let’s see the picks as of about noon on Friday:
User | Wager | Final Score | Units | Result | Payoff |
bullsonparade96 | Coastal Carolina +2.0 points over Virginia; Over 58.5 points in the South Florida-Tulsa game; South Florida +13.0 points over Tulsa (VOID,TBD,TBD) | TBD; TBD; TBD | 400.00 | TBD | 0.00 |
bullsonparade96 | Over 50.0 points in the Bowling Green State-Toledo game; Toledo -15.0 points over Bowling Green State; Ohio -3.5 points over Ball State (WIN,LOSS,WIN) | Bowling Green State 42-35; Bowling Green State 42-35; Ohio 32-18 | 169.47 | LOSS | -169.47 |
bullsonparade96 | Illinois +700.0 money line to beat Michigan | TBD | 100.00 | TBD | 0.00 |
Danj725 | Florida -14.0 points over Vanderbilt; Ohio State -27.5 points over Maryland; Penn State -19.0 points over Rutgers (TBD,TBD,TBD) | TBD; TBD; TBD | 100.00 | TBD | 0.00 |
Danj725 | Tennessee -21.5 points over South Carolina; Cincinnati -17.0 points over Temple; Georgia -22.5 points over Kentucky (TBD,TBD,TBD) | TBD; TBD; TBD | 75.00 | TBD | 0.00 |
Danj725 | Toledo -15.0 points over Bowling Green State; Under 55.0 points in the Ohio-Ball State game (LOSS,WIN) | Bowling Green State 42-35; Ohio 32-18 | 50.00 | LOSS | -50.00 |
Danj725 | Under 60.5 points in the Eastern Michigan-Kent State game; Under 46.0 points in the Miami (OH)-Northern Illinois game; Over 49.5 points in the Western Michigan-Central Michigan game (WIN,LOSS,LOSS) | Eastern Michigan 31-24; Miami (OH) 29-23; Western Michigan 12-10 | 50.00 | LOSS | -50.00 |
Danj725 | Central Florida -16.5 points over Navy; South Florida +13.0 points over Tulsa; Over 65.0 points in the Southern Methodist-Tulane game (TBD,TBD,WIN) | TBD; TBD; Tulane 59-24 | 25.00 | TBD | 0.00 |
Danj725 | Coastal Carolina +110.0 money line to beat Virginia | TBD | 10.00 | VOID | 0.00 |
Danj725 | South Florida +420.0 money line to beat Tulsa | TBD | 10.00 | TBD | 0.00 |
Danj725 | Over 43.0 points in the Connecticut-Army game; Army -10.0 points over Connecticut (TBD,TBD) | TBD; TBD | 10.00 | TBD | 0.00 |
Danj725 | Southern Methodist +140.0 money line to beat Tulane | Tulane 59-24 | 10.00 | LOSS | -10.00 |
dsidwell31 | Oregon +2.0 points over Utah; San Jose State -1.0 points over Utah State; Southern California -2.0 points over UCLA (TBD,TBD,TBD) | TBD; TBD; TBD | 150.00 | TBD | 0.00 |
dsidwell31 | Georgia -21.5 points over Kentucky; Over 48.5 points in the Georgia-Kentucky game (TBD,TBD) | TBD; TBD | 25.00 | TBD | 0.00 |
dsidwell31 | Over 52.0 points in the Louisiana-Florida State game; Over 40.5 points in the Illinois-Michigan game; Tulsa -13.0 points over South Florida (TBD,TBD,TBD) | TBD; TBD; TBD | 25.00 | TBD | 0.00 |
dsidwell31 | Miami (FL) +19.5 points over Clemson; Over 31.5 points in the Iowa-Minnesota game (TBD,TBD) | TBD; TBD | 10.00 | TBD | 0.00 |
dsidwell31 | Louisiana State -14.5 points over Alabama-Birmingham | TBD | 10.00 | TBD | 0.00 |
dsidwell31 | Wake Forest -10.0 points over Syracuse | TBD | 10.00 | TBD | 0.00 |
dsidwell31 | New Mexico State +29.5 points over Missouri | TBD | 10.00 | TBD | 0.00 |
dsidwell31 | Mississippi -2.5 points over Arkansas | TBD | 10.00 | TBD | 0.00 |
E-dogg42 | Under 65.0 points in the Ohio State-Maryland game; Under 63.5 points in the Georgia Tech-North Carolina game; Under 64.5 points in the Colorado-Washington game (TBD,TBD,TBD) | TBD; TBD; TBD | 185.00 | TBD | 0.00 |
E-dogg42 | Over 55.0 points in the Syracuse-Wake Forest game; Under 74.5 points in the Southern California-UCLA game; Over 32.5 points in the Iowa-Minnesota game (TBD,TBD,TBD) | TBD; TBD; TBD | 40.00 | TBD | 0.00 |
E-dogg42 | Over 50.5 points in the Bowling Green State-Toledo game; Over 53.0 points in the Ohio-Ball State game (WIN,LOSS) | Bowling Green State 42-35; Ohio 32-18 | 29.00 | LOSS | -29.00 |
E-dogg42 | Tulane -3.0 points over Southern Methodist; Over 49.5 points in the Western Michigan-Central Michigan game (WIN,LOSS) | Tulane 59-24; Western Michigan 12-10 | 20.00 | LOSS | -20.00 |
E-dogg42 | Over 50.0 points in the Old Dominion-Appalachian State game; Over 51.0 points in the Akron-Buffalo game; Over 45.0 points in the North Carolina State-Louisville game (TBD,TBD,TBD) | TBD; TBD; TBD | 20.00 | TBD | 0.00 |
E-dogg42 | South Florida +13.5 points over Tulsa; Over 59.5 points in the South Florida-Tulsa game (TBD,TBD) | TBD; TBD | 18.00 | TBD | 0.00 |
E-dogg42 | Under 57.5 points in the Florida-Vanderbilt game; Over 52.5 points in the Navy-Central Florida game; Under 39.5 points in the San Diego State-New Mexico game (TBD,TBD,TBD) | TBD; TBD; TBD | 15.89 | TBD | 0.00 |
E-dogg42 | Under 64.5 points in the Colorado-Washington game; Over 55.0 points in the Syracuse-Wake Forest game; Mississippi -2.5 points over Arkansas (TBD,TBD,TBD) | TBD; TBD; TBD | 15.00 | TBD | 0.00 |
E-dogg42 | Over 51.0 points in the San Jose State-Utah State game; Nevada +22.5 points over Fresno State; Oregon -3.0 points over Utah (TBD,TBD,TBD) | TBD; TBD; TBD | 15.00 | TBD | 0.00 |
E-dogg42 | California -4.0 points over Stanford; Oklahoma -7.5 points over Oklahoma State; Southern California -1.5 points over UCLA (TBD,TBD,TBD) | TBD; TBD; TBD | 15.00 | TBD | 0.00 |
E-dogg42 | Under 60.5 points in the Eastern Michigan-Kent State game; Northern Illinois -1.0 points over Miami (OH) (WIN,LOSS) | Eastern Michigan 31-24; Miami (OH) 29-23 | 15.00 | LOSS | -15.00 |
ElliotMoore | Under 61.5 points in the Eastern Michigan-Kent State game; Miami (OH) +3.0 points over Northern Illinois; Western Michigan +10.0 points over Central Michigan (WIN,WIN,WIN) | Eastern Michigan 31-24; Miami (OH) 29-23; Western Michigan 12-10 | 50.00 | WIN | 300.00 |
ElliotMoore | Bowling Green State +15.5 points over Toledo; Ohio -3.5 points over Ball State (WIN,WIN) | Bowling Green State 42-35; Ohio 32-18 | 45.00 | WIN | 117.00 |
ElliotMoore | South Florida +13.5 points over Tulsa | TBD | 30.00 | TBD | 0.00 |
ElliotMoore | Oregon -2.5 points over Utah (-102) | TBD | 30.00 | TBD | 0.00 |
ElliotMoore | Over 43.5 points in the Illinois-Michigan game | TBD | 30.00 | TBD | 0.00 |
ElliotMoore | Florida -14.5 points over Vanderbilt | TBD | 30.00 | TBD | 0.00 |
GaryStephen | Texas Christian -3.0 points over Baylor | TBD | 44.00 | TBD | 0.00 |
GaryStephen | Over 38.5 points in the Wisconsin-Nebraska game | TBD | 33.00 | TBD | 0.00 |
GaryStephen | Louisiana State -14.5 points over Alabama-Birmingham (-102) | TBD | 22.00 | TBD | 0.00 |
ULhothot | Michigan -17.5 points over Illinois; Michigan State -10.0 points over Indiana (TBD,TBD) | TBD; TBD | 50.00 | TBD | 0.00 |
ULhothot | Clemson -18.5 points over Miami (FL); James Madison -8.5 points over Georgia State (TBD,TBD) | TBD; TBD | 35.00 | TBD | 0.00 |
ULhothot | Michigan -17.5 points over Illinois; Kansas State -7.5 points over West Virginia; Clemson -18.5 points over Miami (FL) (TBD,TBD,TBD) | TBD; TBD; TBD | 30.00 | TBD | 0.00 |
ULhothot | Kansas State -7.5 points over West Virginia; Over 65.0 points in the Oklahoma State-Oklahoma game (TBD,TBD) | TBD; TBD | 30.00 | TBD | 0.00 |
ULhothot | Western Kentucky +190.0 money line to beat Auburn | TBD | 25.00 | TBD | 0.00 |
ULhothot | James Madison -8.5 points over Georgia State; Clemson -18.5 points over Miami (FL); Over 65.0 points in the Oklahoma State-Oklahoma game (TBD,TBD,TBD) | TBD; TBD; TBD | 25.00 | TBD | 0.00 |
ULhothot | James Madison -8.5 points over Georgia State; Michigan State -10.0 points over Indiana; Michigan -17.5 points over Illinois (TBD,TBD,TBD) | TBD; TBD; TBD | 20.00 | TBD | 0.00 |
ULhothot | Miami (FL) +19.5 points over Clemson; Rice +13.0 points over Texas-San Antonio; Northwestern +18.0 points over Purdue (TBD,TBD,TBD) | TBD; TBD; TBD | 15.00 | TBD | 0.00 |
ULhothot | Northwestern +750.0 money line to beat Purdue | TBD | 5.00 | TBD | 0.00 |
ULhothot | Georgia Tech +900.0 money line to beat North Carolina | TBD | 5.00 | TBD | 0.00 |
ULhothot | Miami (FL) +800.0 money line to beat Clemson | TBD | 5.00 | TBD | 0.00 |
ULhothot | Rice +400.0 money line to beat Texas-San Antonio | TBD | 5.00 | TBD | 0.00 |
ElliotMoore has moved into fourth place in the season-long money race, on the power of two more MACtion parlay wins.
After this weekend is over, the results will be posted to this thread.
RESULTS
I knew I shouldn’t have questioned bullsonparade96’s 400-unit parlay. It of course won easily, vaulting bullsonparade96 back into first place. Sportscaster’s curse strikes again.
Last week’s leader jrjs kept pace though, hitting another coordinated parlay on UMass +38/Under 48 versus Texas A&M. That’s the proper name for this type of play. Which I just this week learned that real sports books don’t allow. PYU has never had rules against them, and Rule 7 explicitly allows them, so they’re permissible here. Just be aware you can’t actually make this bet for real, in any locale where sports gambling is permissible.
Next season will probably have a rule disallowing this type of play, but that’ll be the least of it. I’m working on an ambitious re-imagining of PYU for next season. I’ll make a formal announcement when there’s something ready to you all the demo and test. I don’t want to Duke Nukem Forever this any more than I already have.
Week 12 winners were:
bullsonparade96 | 770.53 |
jrjs | 479.00 |
ElliotMoore | 413.68 |
Defdans | 262.00 |
This differs little from what the weekly standings were after the noon kickoffs:
Week 12 standings so far:@H_Jimenez96 770.53@_jrjs 479.00@esmoore3 384.27
— ProtectYourU.Net (@protectyouru) November 19, 2022
defdans 57.00
All the big wins were from weeknight or early Saturday games. E-Dogg42 had one late parlay hit that included two west coast games, but it wasn’t enough to put him in the black for the week. Let’s review the big winning bets now:
bullsonparade96 | Coastal Carolina +2.0 points over Virginia; Over 58.5 points in the South Florida-Tulsa game; South Florida +13.0 points over Tulsa (VOID,WIN,WIN) | Virginia 0-0; Tulsa 48-42; Tulsa 48-42 | 400.00 | WIN | 1040.00 | |
jrjs | Under 48.0 points in the Massachusetts-Texas A&M game; Massachusetts +33.5 points over Texas A&M (WIN,WIN) | Texas A&M 20-3; Texas A&M 20-3 | 300.00 | WIN | 780.00 | |
ElliotMoore | Under 61.5 points in the Eastern Michigan-Kent State game; Miami (OH) +3.0 points over Northern Illinois; Western Michigan +10.0 points over Central Michigan (WIN,WIN,WIN) | Eastern Michigan 31-24; Miami (OH) 29-23; Western Michigan 12-10 | 50.00 | WIN | 300.00 | |
Defdans | South Carolina +1200.0 money line to beat Tennessee | South Carolina 63-38 | 20.00 | WIN | 240.00 | |
Defdans | Over 58.0 points in the South Florida-Tulsa game; Over 47.0 points in the Indiana-Michigan State game (WIN,WIN) | Tulsa 48-42; Indiana 39-31 | 70.00 | WIN | 182.00 | |
ElliotMoore | Ohio -3.5 points over Ball State; Bowling Green State +15.5 points over Toledo (WIN,WIN) | Ohio 32-18; Bowling Green State 42-35 | 45.00 | WIN | 117.00 | |
E-dogg42 | California -4.0 points over Stanford; Oklahoma -7.5 points over Oklahoma State; Southern California -1.5 points over UCLA (WIN,WIN,WIN) | California 27-20; Oklahoma 28-13; Southern California 48-45 | 15.00 | WIN | 90.00 |
I love a good moneyline longshot, and defdans scored on South Carolina +1200. ULhothot also hit on Georgia Tech +900. bullsonparade96 could have won even more if Illinois had held off Michigan at +700.
Before we review season-long standings, a futures note: most win-loss futures have clinched a win or loss, but won’t be settled until after the team plays its last regular season game. For most, that will be after next weekend. ULhothot had three of his futures bets settled this week: Oklahoma State to win the Big XII and/or national championship have both been marked a loss, as they have four losses and are mathematically eliminated from the former. His bet on Virginia to win less than 7 games was voided, because they had a game cancelled. The 50 units he bet on that has been returned to his bankroll, and his “pending futures” amount is updated to reflect only those that are still pending.
Andrewpina, briank19, defdans, LrdNorman, McIntyre2K7, and ULhothot have all clinched a windfall, provided every team plays its last game as scheduled. dsidwell will also, if Hawaii loses its last game. These are all still pending futures in the money standings. Which are:
User | Total | Pending Futures | Grand Total Excluding Futures |
bullsonparade96 | 3448.43 | 0 | 3448.43 |
jrjs | 3360.80 | 0 | 3360.80 |
McIntyre2K7 | 1675.69 | 30 | 1705.69 |
ElliotMoore | 1576.90 | 0 | 1576.90 |
E-dogg42 | 1333.48 | 0 | 1333.48 |
Defdans | 1202.38 | 190 | 1392.38 |
Danj725 | 1069.95 | 0 | 1069.95 |
Gym399 | 1015.40 | 0 | 1015.40 |
GaryStephen | 948.73 | 0 | 948.73 |
andrewpina | 786.41 | 250 | 1036.41 |
dsidwell31 | 744.31 | 100 | 844.31 |
jjlovecub | 677.00 | 0 | 677.00 |
Gibbsak | 576.55 | 0 | 576.55 |
ULhothot | 546.95 | 140 | 686.95 |
mcgies852 | 519.66 | 0 | 519.66 |
Squirbs | 497.01 | 0 | 497.01 |
anthonyvito | 386.37 | 0 | 386.37 |
briank19 | 257.04 | 150 | 407.04 |
Julmisteforheisman | 235.15 | 0 | 235.15 |
lrdnorman | 188.39 | 170 | 358.39 |
speruche | 0.00 | 0 | 0.00 |
It’s a two-man race now between BOP96 and jrjs! McIntyre2K7 fell to third place after taking a big swing:
McIntyre2K7 | Over 54.5 points in the Kansas State-West Virginia game; Over 47.5 points in the Georgia-Kentucky game; Under 47.5 points in the Texas Tech-Iowa State game (WIN,LOSS,WIN) | Kansas State 48-31; Georgia 16-6; Texas Tech 14-10 | 550.00 | LOSS | -550.00 | 0 |
McIntyre2K7 | Over 41.5 points in the Illinois-Michigan game; Over 52.5 points in the Navy-Central Florida game (LOSS,LOSS) | Michigan 19-17; Navy 17-14 | 528.56 | LOSS | -528.56 |
Too bad PYU doesn’t offer the European-style “trixie” or “patent” bet, as that would have offset some of the losses. Cough cough ambitious re-imagining cough cough.
And finally, the points standings:
PLAYER | TOTAL POINTS | WEEK 12 POINTS |
jrjs | 74 | 10 |
McIntyre2K7 | 73 | |
bullsonparade96 | 69 | 15 |
Danj725 | 47 | |
ElliotMoore | 47 | 7 |
Defdans | 42 | 5 |
Only five points separate the top three! Danj725, ElliotMoore, and defdans are still mathematically in the points race, as a maximum of 45 more points is possible. No one else can earn enough points to take the lead. There are three weeks left: Week 13 is Thanksgiving weekend, followed by Week 14 (championship games, Army-Navy, any other games). All of bowl season is Week 15.
Speaking of Week 13: we all know where it starts and ends, with a game I think we’re all glad to see go away. Central Florida needs a win, to assure its spot in the conference championship game; a loss eliminates them. The winner of Tulane-Cincinnati will host that conference title game. Houston will also finish tied for second at 6-2 if they beat Tulsa, but they can’t win any tie-breaker.
Among the soon-to-merged schools, UTSA will host the Conference USA championship game next week; they play UTEP in their regular season finale. North Texas will be the opponent, as long as they beat Rice, or FAU beats Western Kentucky.
Games of no championship import are East Carolina-Temple, Memphis-SMU, and UAB-Louisiana Tech. Navy is off, before the Army game next week. Charlotte’s regular season is over.
It’s Thanksgiving weekend, so you know which big rivalries are on. The biggest one is of course Michigan-Ohio State, with huge national implications. Notre Dame-USC and Oregon-Oregon State are the other Top 25 games. The Egg Bowl is on Thursday night. NC State-North Carolina is Friday night. Saturday includes Auburn-Alabama, Florida-Florida State, Georgia Tech-Georgia, South Carolina-Clemson, Tennessee-Vanderbilt, Louisville-Kentucky, Kansas-Kansas State, and Washington-Washington State.
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