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"Protect Your Unit" Game - Week 10 Picks

DISCLAIMER: These picks are for entertainment purposes only. No actual wagering is being performed.

Several players chose to take this week off. There's only one Big East game this weekend (Louisville vs. Syracuse) and fake money is running out, so it's a good week for people to regroup.

People like me:

I am not playing this week. I don't care if Chattanooga is a two-touchdown favorite over Auburn, or if the over/under on Louisville and Syracuse has been set to 600 points. I'm taking the week off. I just want to enjoy my Illinois-Michigan DERP-off in peace without worrying about the spread.

Other people manned up and made picks this week, so let's begin with last week's leader, Hoya Suxa.

Quick question: What's better than the college football/college basketball crossover season?

No, not your girlfriend or whatever you're pumping these days. She's a dirty skank and is slowly decreasing your willingness to live. The correct answer: Goldeneye returning to the Wii.

Now, I'm not much of a video game guy. All I pretty much play nowadays is Mario Kart and I only do it when I'm tanked up on delicious beers and don't feel like drunk driving in real life. Call of Duty, Madden, Halo . . . none of that stuff matters in my particular existence. But Goldeneye, that's a different story. I am jacked through the freaking roof for this game and I'm picking it up Friday as soon as I flee the office, hell bent on staying up all weekend bombing the virtual shit out of my friends.

This game is perfection, much like a Doug Marrone program plan. And it's going to be awesome. I mean, if you're like me, that game pretty much defined your college experience. Beer, pizza, and Goldeneye for 12 hours straight: Just a standard Tuesday back in the day.

WAGER ONE: Rocket launchers in The Facility.
I love destruction. I really love destruction escalated to the point of ridiculousness. When you use rocket launchers in close confines, you're not trying so much to rack up kills as you're trying to avoid suicides. It's zero-sum Goldeneye warfare. That's exactly what Louisville-Syracuse is going to be this week: Two banged up, pragmatic objects butting heads with each other for four quarters and whoever avoids running into explosions the most wins.

I'm taking the under (44 points) for $25.

WAGER TWO: Proximity mines in The Temple
If you get too close, shit's gonna explode. That's kind of like Michigan's defense: it's just a matter of time before it detonates.

$35 on Illinois +3.

WAGER THREE: License to Kill setting in The Complex
It's two in the morning and everyone is piss drunk. Your asshole friend sets the gameplay to License to Kill and decides he's not going to shoot anybody this round. No, that asshole is going to fuck around and slap everyone to death. What a dick. Of course you're in The Complex because that fuckhead wants to sneak up on you and and Miyagi your ass from behind like a son of a bitch. Fuck him; you didn't even see it coming. Fuck.

Kind of like when Florida fucks you on a parlay, no?

Well, as I don't learn from my mistakes: Florida (-14.5), Temple (-3), and Penn State (-6). I'm bundling it for $25.

I want to end the post right here because I don't think we can really top that. But there are more picks, starting with WVUIE97 from The Smoking Musket. Take it away, sir.

I finally made it over $1000 and don't really like this week's games and am out of byes, therefore, I'm going a bit conservative:

$10 Louisville (+6) over Syracuse
$50 Oklahoma (-3) over Texas A&M
$50 Boise St. (-21) over Hawaii

More picks after the jump.

Kevin Meacham from The UConn Blog is taking the week off because, as he says, "Do not want to even think about touching that Louisville-Syracuse game." We won't mention the song he sent us to indicate he was taking a bye, actually yes we will, it was "Bye Bye Bye" by *NSYNC and we are worried about him.

Casual Hoya is up next, and he already has one win in the bank this week.

$100 on Georgia Tech +13 over Virginia Tech
$5 on Louisville +6 over Syracuse
$100 on SMU -6.5 over UTEP

On to Chas Rich from Pitt Blather for his picks.

I seem to be treading water. A little up, a little more down. So, if that's the case I'm taking my fake gambling on a theme week: Past, present and future Big East bets.

A couple blasts from the past (and in some corners future). Starting with $36 on Temple -3 against Kent State. Does anyone else realize that this will be game 10 for Temple and that they are already bowl eligible? It's almost as if Temple is looking to leave most of November wide open for Al Golden to take long trips to Penn State to measure out his future office.

Staying in the Big East's past, $27 on Miami -7.5 versus Maryland. The Canes are such a strange team. Up-and-down from game to game. This has to be an up game.

Now for the future. Or possible futures. Hey, UCF plays Houston this weekend. The winner gets to be third in line for a Big East invite. Loser falls behind Memphis and East Carolina. I'll put $9 on Houston at +2.

As for who is first or second in line, TCU has Utah. I'm placing a whole $2 on Utah +5. At the very least, try and make that Pitt loss look better.

Finally, there is only one Big East game, which makes it that much more ridiculous that I still have not taken a bye week.

Hell must be freezing over. I'm riding the Orange -6 over Louisville for $16.

Now it's time for the weekly parlay and tease madness from Scott of Bearcats Blog.

Syracuse -6 for 10

8 team 6 point tease for 65. I should have never hit one of these.
Alabama -0.5, Iowa -11.5, Louisville +12, Michigan State -18.5, Oklahoma +3, Utah +11, Oregon -29.5, Wisconsin -14

NC State +3.5 for 20

Ken just won his parlay already, because as I'm writing this it's Michigan 31, Illinois 28. They've over 57.5 and it's not even halftime. Welcome back to the competition, sir.

$248 parlay UCF -2 and Michigan/Illinois OVER 57.5.
$1 Syracuse -6 over Louisville
$1 TCU -5 over Utah

Sean Keeley at Troy Nunes Is an Absolute Magician took a bye week. Meanwhile, Chris Lane of The Nova Blog sent in picks on Friday afternoon. Our weekly deadline is the moment the ESPN Thursday night game kicks off, so I denied his picks and forced him to take a bye. There was some mild protest, but it turns out I saved him a ton of money because he had $248 on Western Michigan +3.5 at Central Michigan, and the Chippewas ended up winning 26-22. You're welcome, Chris.

Andrew Porter from The UConn Blog is up next, and I think he's confused by the rules. You can bet more money than you actually have since there's no limit to how much you can lose. We just go $1000 at a time for administrative purposes.

Ahh, I was hoping for a cool prop bet to be thrown in like "How many angry comments from USF fans will I have to read after On The Banks submits its next power ranking ballot."

I'm sure we'll come in 7th this week. Although if OTB puts us 8th again just out of spite, that would be a pretty funny bit.

Anyway, I can no longer bet $250, because I don't have that much. So $50 on each of these:

Louisville at Syracuse - UNDER 44
Miami -7.5 over Maryland.
Temple -3 over Kent St.

Finally, Toro Grande's picks. For someone in next-to-last place, though, he certainly has confidence...


If I had a 3 team parlay that I felt really good about... is that something you might be interested in? $248 with 6-1 odds. Go big or go home.

Georgia Tech +13 over Virginia Tech. Beamer Ball runs into Option Ball
FSU -10.5 over UNC. How long until Lawrence Taylor is back in UNC's locker room, this time as a life counselor?
Florida -14.5 over Vandy. NO ONE is a better front runner than Urb's Gators. They're out to prove they can can capitalize on beating UGA by rolling the hell out of the smart kids.

$1 Syracuse -6 over Louisville. Time to finally give up on 'Cuse hating, and make some milk money.

$1 Temple -3 over Kent State. I'm still convinced Temple has an outside shot at readmittance to the Big East as football only. That's a VERY outside shot by the way.

Check back on Monday for what might be some dramatically different standings.