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"Protect Your Unit" Game - Week 7 Picks

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via sydlexia.com

One of the commenters on EDSBS's Mad Wagerin' post this week dropped that picture into the comments. Figured it summed up everything pretty well. Give me a little time to tweak it and I think we'll finally have a logo for this game.

DISCLAIMER: These picks are for entertainment purposes only. No actual wagering is being performed.

Let's get going with the picks. Leading off for the third straight week because they came in leading for the third straight week... Casual Hoya.

$50 on Louisville (+3) over Cincinnati
$100 on NC State (-7) over East Carolina
$50 on North Texas (+5.5) over FIU...

Running to the airport for a bachelor party in montreal... Any recs?

If you have any recommendations for Casual Hoya in Montreal besides what a bunch of red-blooded American males might suggest as entertainment in Montreal, leave them in the comments and we'll get them sent over to him. (The Canadiens don't count.)

Up next is Chas Rich from Pitt Blather, who's quietly put together a nice little run to get back into the mix. Chas, who you got?

Two games I just can't go near.

First Pitt (+1) vs. 'Cuse. Sticking with not betting on Pitt the rest of the season, but this is simply tempting from a gambling standpoint. Not favored, and the only team in the Big East against whom Wannstedt is undefeated.

Alabama (-20.5) over Ole Miss. But for the Houston Nutt factor, I would be betting large on this. I would expect Alabama to take out a load of frustration on the Rebs. But years of reading EDSBS has me wary of ever touching a game that involves the Right Reverend.

So on to the remains.

Kansas State (-3) over Kansas for $75. Road favorite in a rivalry game. I should be more nervous about this pick, but Kansas isn't that good. Plus Bill Snyder is an asshole who loves to pile on when he can.

Everyone is saying how Nebraska has this game with Texas circled on their calendars because of the Big 12 title game from last year. Then they hedge because while Texas has been disappointing, there is plenty of talent to keep it close. Not me. I'm saying Nebraska goes overboard taking at Texas, so Mack Brown does a Tim Brewster impression after the game. $75 on Nebraska (-9.5)

Hate the Big East game choices this week. Hate even more going with Rutgers in a game. $30 on Rutgers (-7) against Army. Schiano has no choice but to throw the ball with his present running game, so he should stumble into enough points to win by more than 7.

More picks after the jump.

Remembering to get his picks in on time this week is a victorious WVUIE97 from The Smoking Musket:

$50 Cincinnati (-3) over Louisville
$25 Iowa (-3.5) over Michigan
$100 Nebraska (-9.5) over Texas
$50 Auburn (-4) over Arkansas

And a $25 parlay on the last three (Iowa, Neb, Aub)

Next is Kevin Meacham from The UConn Blog, one of the only players who was not stupid enough to bet on Rutgers last week. (Yes, we're still pissed.)

It's moving day. I have the feeling this week will determine whether I have a chance at winning the $10,000 cash prize (that's what we're playing for right?) or whether I will end up with the common Lanes and Porters of the standings. Time to go big or go home:

$125 Cincinnati (-3) over Louisville
$50 Iowa (-3.5) over Michigan
$30 Notre Dame and Western Michigan OVER 52
$30 Virginia Tech and Wake Forest UNDER 56.5

Hedge with hate:
$15 SMU (+1.5) over Navy, in the hopes of jinxing Craig James' alma mater.

And now for the part of the week I vaguely dread... it's time for Scott from Bearcats Blog to put his money down like the guy who puts a single chip on 15 different numbers at the roulette wheel. Let's see what happens this week.

Nothing insane like last week today

My calculator is happy already.

Although I did decide to bet more in an effort to join Chris in the poor house.

Air Force (-1) over San Diego State for $40
Pittsburgh (+1) over Syracuse for $20

6 pt tease: Arizona -17.5, Air Force +5, South Carolina +1, Nevada -1, Wisconsin +10, Missouri +9.5 for 25

That was surprisingly tame. But we'll fix that because Glaude is never, ever tame. Hoya Suxa, take it away.

It's basketball season, you guys! Midnight Madness and such. Hoops and hoops and hoops and hoops.

College football is sweetness, but I love college basketball like the Mormons love Jesus.

And, you know, it's really time to start hating the hell out of Georgetown. Hoya Suxa pageviews, motherfuckers. They skyrocket for the next six months.

WAGER ONE: Pittsburgh at Syracuse (Over/Under 44)
I'm still in the "skeptical" camp when it comes to the Orange, but I no longer feel ashamed wearing the colors when I go out post-game and get belligerently drunk.

There is one thing I'm sure about, though: Dave Wannstedt and Doug Marrone are going to grind down Saturday's game until it is a fine powder. I'm taking the under here for $20.

WAGER TWO: Iowa (-3.5) at Michigan
I've decided to Twittersource one game a week. The results were resounding: People have more faith in the housing market than Greg Robinson.

I'm laying the wood heavy on Iowa here. $120 to the window. If this doesn't come through, I'm unfollowing all the clowns that are still obsessed with Greg Robinson's salt and pepper 'do.

WAGER THREE: South Carolina (-5) at Kentucky
Spurrier, Spurrier, Spurrier, Spurrier, Spurrier, Spurrier, Spurrier, Spurrier, Spurrier, Spurrier, Spurrier, Spurrier. The Gamecocks cover. $20 on the line, babycakes.

WAGER FOUR: Ohio State at Wisconsin (Over/Under 49)
This game has all the making of field goal warfare. $40 on the under (the way, way, way under).

WAGER FIVE: The "I Believe In Me/Must Take Down Casual Hoya" Parlay. I'm bunching together all four wagers in a parlay. $10 and a higher rung on the leader board are on the line.

Next we come to Sean Keeley of Troy Nunes Is an Absolute Magician, the first in the group of players who just got stomped last week.

$25 on West Virginia -10 over USF. South Florida's all kinds of discombobulated this short week, not a good time to be strolling into Morgantown.

$25 on Syracuse -1 over Pitt. Why? Cause Syracuse fans have officially thrown caution to the wind and we're going all in. Well, $25 in.

$50 on Michigan State -7 over Illinois. The Illini used up all their feel-good points last weekend. Michigan State is the new Penn State, Penn State is the new Michigan State and Illinois is the new Illinois.

Toro Grande is up next, and as you'll see, he's already clinched a second straight week of massive failure.

Hey, I hate money. Do you hate money too?? Well then check out these picks!!

FYI, I don't see anything that jumps out at me as a line I have to hammer this week. It's not exactly dart board territory, but it's not nearly as juicy to my eye as last week. By the way, I lost the absolute maximum allowed in this contest last week. And I was in love with the board. You know what this means... Dumb Luck First Place here I come!!

Parlayyyyyyyy, Parlayyyyyyyy... So Messed Up Can't Open My Eyes: Two sides, $248. Rock Chalk Jay Hawk (Kansas) +3 over Horrendous Little Brother (Kansas State), Miami and Duke over 58.5.

This is a battle of bad vs. worse, but worse is getting 3 at home on Thursday night. Strictly a trend play, and because I don't have the soul to load up against my alma mater even though I think we get stomped by far more than 10 tonight. And Duke actually scores points, and Jacory Harris might score more points (for and against) than any QB in America. He goes from John Elway to Reggie Ball with absolutely no in between, and the totals love him for it.

$1 two team tease on one game, Louisville up to +9, Cincinnati up to +3. This line is so pure you could use a case of baking soda and not cut it enough. And yes, I watched The Two Escobars and Scarface this week. This game has to land in that zone, so the up and down play works for sure here.

$1 FIU (-5.5) over North Texas. I have a few friends that work at FIU Athletics, and they're all exhausted and miserable right now. This is strictly a solidarity play for them so that they can get through the season.

And now let's see how much money I can lose this week.

- Pittsburgh (+1) over Syracuse for $27.50. This isn't a spite pick. I just figure this is about the point in the season where Stache starts rolling off a bunch of wins because the pressure is off.

- $25 on the Army money line (+230) over Rutgers. On the other hand, this is totally a spite pick.

- TCU (-29) over BYU for $55. TCU's played two home games with huge lines this year, and covered them both easily. BYU is horrible and I think there will be some residual anger over the Cougars blowing up the Mountain West and possibly the Frogs' shot at an auto-bid league. (UNLESS YOU JOIN THE BIG EAST LIKE YOU KNOW YOU WANT TO JUST SAY YES FROGGIES YOU NEED THIS AND I NEED IT TOO.)

- Florida (-7.5) over Mississippi State for $27.50. Addazio gets fired on the spot if he can't beat the Bulldogs by more than a touchdown at home.

- Baylor (+1) over Colorado for $27.50. PLAY ME OFF SAD HAWKINS GIF.

As always, from the Shaggy Bevo message boards... SAD HAWKINS, GO.

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To finish the Voodoo Five three, here are Ken's picks.

Let's see how I can blow all my money this week.

Michigan/Iowa OVER 53.5. You know Iowa is going to somehow score 40 points this week. Greg Robinson just wants everyone to know yes that he fucked up at Syracuse, and he's taking Michigan down with him just because. $50

Nevada/Hawaii OVER 74. Its going to happen. You are nodding in agreement that its going to end up 52-48, and that I will cover easily. $50

Baylor -1 over Colorado. I think Vegas went meh when they saw this game. Robert Griffin will win this one by himself. $50

Southern Miss -14.5 over Memphis. I think the PYU guys could beat Memphis right now. $25

Nebraska -9.5 over Texas. If UCLA can run on them, wait until Taylor Martinez is unleashed on the Horns. $50

MNTPOTY: All of the above plus Kansas State -3, NC State -7, Georgia -15, and Idaho -1.5 $15

Wait I still need to make a Big East bet. Scrolls lines...... USF +10 over WVU. OH GOD WHAT AM I DOING!!! $10

Down to just two. Here's Mr. All-In himself, Andrew Porter from The UConn Blog.

Last second picks here, no research, gut only:

$100 on Pitt +1 over Cuse
$75 on Air Force -1 over San Diego St.
$25 on Army +7 over Rutgers

Chris Lane from The Nova Blog has been in last place for the last three weeks running, but he might finally be getting out of (his mother's) basement this week! HA HA BLOGGER JOKE.

Seriously, he already hit a big one this week. Take a look.

I hate this game. I can't get out of last no matter what I do. NO BYE WEEKS! In ascending order we go, to most degenerate bet:

Louisville +3 over Cincinnati ($10) -- BIG EAST requirement, but The Ville is putting up decent numbers that nobody notices.

Notre Dame -24 over WMU ($20) -- Rolling with a team that seems more than willing to cover the spread when they win.

USC -2.5 over Cal ($20) -- Lane Kiffin's gotta cover more than one spread this year, right? Anyone???

Kansas State -3 over Kansas ($200) -- Getting this out of the way tonight. God help me. Carson Coffman you better have some magic in you.

Carson Coffman must have a lot of magic in him because the Wildcats covered that line by a mere 49 points. Nice going Chris!

Results coming Monday. Enjoy this weekend's games while I do not enjoy watching the last two USF games to figure out what is wrong with our quarterback.