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College Football Week 8 TV Viewing Guide (Nihilist Edition)

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LIFE IS MEANINGLESS AND SO ARE THESE FOOTBALL GAMES, ENJOY WASTING YOUR DAY

OHIO STATE AT PENN STATE

USF LOST LAST NIGHT. THIS WEEKEND IS RUINED IRREPARABLY, JUST LIKE ALL THE OTHERS YOU HAVE SPENT OR WILL EVER SPENT. NO ONE TRULY LOVES YOU. SIT DOWN AND SHUT UP AND WATCH THESE FOOTBALL GAMES AND WAIT FOR DEATH.

Saturday, Oct. 22, 2016
Matchup Time (ET) TV / Online
NC State at (7) Louisville Noon ABC / ESPN3
(10) Wisconsin at Iowa Noon ESPN / WatchESPN
Texas at Kansas State Noon ESPN2 / WatchESPN
Indiana at Northwestern Noon BTN / BTN2Go
Oklahoma State at Kansas Noon FS1 / FS Go
Rutgers at Minnesota Noon ESPNU / WatchESPN
Central Michigan at Toledo Noon BCSN/TWC / ESPN3
Miami (OH) at Bowling Green Noon ESPN3
North Texas at Army Noon CBSSN / CBSSports.com
UCF at UConn Noon ESPNEWS / WatchESPN
UMass at South Carolina Noon SECN / WatchESPN
Syracuse at Boston College 12:30 p.m. ACCN / WatchESPN
Ohio at Kent State 1:00 p.m. ESPN3
Hawaii at Air Force 2:00 p.m. Oceanic PPV
(22) North Carolina at Virginia 3:00 p.m. RSN / ESPN3
Colorado at Stanford 3:00 p.m. Pac-12N / Pac-12.com
Akron at Ball State 3:00 p.m. ESPN3
(6) Texas A&M at (1) Alabama 3:30 p.m. CBS / CBSSports.com
Illinois at (3) Michigan 3:30 p.m. BTN / BTN2Go
Purdue at (8) Nebraska 3:30 p.m. ABC/ESPN2 (RM) / ESPN3
TCU at (12) West Virginia 3:30 p.m. ABC/ESPN2 (RM) / ESPN3
Eastern Michigan at (20) Western Michigan 3:30 p.m. ASN / ESPN3
Memphis at (24) Navy 3:30 p.m. CBSSN / CBSSports.com
Buffalo at NIU 3:30 p.m. ESPN3
Idaho at Appalachian State 3:30 p.m. ESPN3
PVAMU at Rice 3:30 p.m. CUSA.TV
UT Martin at Georgia State 3:30 p.m. ESPN3
Tulane at Tulsa 3:45 p.m. ESPNU / WatchESPN
Middle Tennessee at Missouri 4:00 p.m. SECN / WatchESPN
(19) Utah at UCLA 4:00 p.m. FOX / FS Go
Charlotte at Marshall 5:30 p.m. beIN Sports / beIN Video
Colorado State at UNLV 5:30 p.m. ROOT SPORTS / MWN
(17) Arkansas at (21) Auburn 6:00 p.m. ESPN / WatchESPN
Oregon State at (5) Washington 6:30 p.m. Pac-12N / Pac-12.com
(11) Houston at SMU 7:00 p.m. ESPN2 / WatchESPN
East Carolina at Cincinnati 7:00 p.m. CBSSN / CBSSports.com
Louisiana Tech at FIU 7:00 p.m. ESPN3
Old Dominion at WKU 7:00 p.m. ASN
UL Lafayette at Texas State 7:00 p.m. TSSP / ESPN3
UTEP at UTSA 7:00 p.m. KMYS-CW 35
Michigan State at Maryland 7:30 p.m. BTN / BTN2Go
Mississippi State at Kentucky 7:30 p.m. SECN / WatchESPN
Tennessee State at Vanderbilt 7:30 p.m. ESPNU / WatchESPN
(2) Ohio State at Penn State 8:00 p.m. ABC / ESPN3
(16) Oklahoma at Texas Tech 8:00 p.m. FOX / FS Go
Georgia Southern at New Mexico State 8:00 p.m. ESPN3
(23) Ole Miss at (25) LSU 9:00 p.m. ESPN / WatchESPN
ULM at New Mexico 9:00 p.m. ROOT SPORTS / MWN
Washington State at Arizona State 10:00 p.m. Pac-12N / Pac-12.com
Fresno State at Utah State 10:30 p.m. CBSSN / CBSSports.com
Wyoming at Nevada 10:30 p.m. ESPN2 / WatchESPN

HERE IS WHAT WE WILL WATCH TO DULL THE PAIN OF OUR OWN PERMANENT IRRELEVANCE:

12:00 p.m.: RUTGERS IS ABSOLUTELY USELESS IN EVERY WAY, AND YET THEY ARE IN THE BIG TEN, GETTING OBSCENELY LARGE PAYCHECKS FOR THE REST OF TIME AND NOTHING CAN TAKE THAT AWAY. DWELL ON THE CRUELTY OF LIFE AND THE COSMIC INJUSTICE AS YOU WATCH THEM PLAY MINNESOTA.

3:30 p.m.: ALABAMA IS A WALKING REMINDER THAT ALL YOUR HOPES AND DREAMS WILL BE CRUSHED. EVERYTHING YOU LOVE WILL TURN TO DUST ONE DAY, JUST LIKE TEXAS A&M WILL IN THIS GAME.

7:00 p.m.: HOUSTON ONCE SCORED 95 POINTS AGAINST SMU WHEN THEY WERE AT THEIR WEAKEST AND MOST VULNERABLE. THERE IS NO HOPE, ESPECIALLY FOR THOSE WHO NEED A GLIMMER OF HOPE TO CONTINUE THEIR GRIM STRUGGLE FOR SURVIVAL.

10:00 p.m.: Washington State-Arizona State should be a lot of fun!