In every coaching search, there’s always somebody suggesting ridiculous candidates for the job. Instead of waiting for those wack ideas to come to us, we’re being proactive and bringing our wack ideas to you.
Joe Maddon (current job: manager, Chicago Cubs)
Aren't you tired of watching football games filled with coaches who punt on 4th and 1, freak out about turnovers, and butcher the clock? Why would you want one of those guys on the sidelines at USF? If you want someone who will never make a bad decision on game day, I propose hiring the smartest man to ever coach a team in Tampa Bay.
You might ask, why would Maddon want to coach football after a lifetime in baseball? To get back to his roots, perhaps. Maddon was briefly the starting quarterback at Lafayette College, where he was both very good and very ahead of his time. He was running RPOs in the early 1970s, playing chess while everyone else was playing three-yards-and-a-cloud-of-dust checkers. It would take him no time at all to adjust to modern college football.
With his famously loose clubhouse atmospheres and confidence-building treatment of players, recruiting shouldn't be too much trouble. And besides, after leading the dang Chicago Cubs to a dang World Series title, how could he possibly top that next year? Now's the perfect time for a sport and life change. Welcome home, Joe.